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Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Yeah!... Wait... AACK!!....

We got a new minivan... No, I got a new minivan... (Yeah!) It is pretty light blue and will eat half my monthly paycheck... But we had no choice really... The other one kept dying on us. My Mom has been watching the baby while Sam is at school so I can get my hours in at work, but we will soon have a MAJOR PROBLEM on our hands. Mom is having BOTH her knees replaced on April 10th and will be out of commission for six to eight weeks. What that means for me is... No sitter for the baby. I can not work nights because they lock the upper floor of the building after nine PM. I need a minimum of twenty-five hours per week to make bills. That means I will likely end up working two twelve and a half hour days per week (my husband's two days off) until Mom is well again. My fibromyalgia will not be pleased by that schedule, but a Mom has to do what a Mom has to do! I am dreading the long hours! (AACK!!) :(

16 comments:

Ranea said...

It's always something isn't it!

icy_highs said...

shes replacing both her kneecaps..? u must have been a complete nightmare growing up!

Melissa said...

ranea - You know the Irish blessing... May the wind always be at your back...? Well, the wind is at my back all the time... BLOWING ME OVER!!!!! I have just learned to run when the gusts hit...

Melissa said...

icy_highs - thanks for stopping by! As for the nightmare thing... it depends on the day you ask her, but mostly she only blames the gray hairs on me... She seems to feel it is revenge enough that I morphed into a younger version of her as soon as I had kids of my own. :)

siren said...

The fun never stops. I wish you well, hope you don't overdo it. Sometimes, having to be responsible really sucks :)

starbender said...

Oh-it is sooo hard when U have little ones! I remember the days all 2 well. I was a single mom, with 2 very sm. kiddies. I have family here, but they were 2 busy with their own lives to want 2 help with babysitting! I feel 4 you hon, it just makes life a little harder!
Hope everything works out 4 you. Congrats on the new Van. I luv 'em.
:)

Sol said...

yer courage reminds me..of Christopher Reeve

::soft smile::

iz yer mom replacin' em with bionic knees?? j/k ;)

Anonymous said...

Is your life so hard that you can't just get a grip and grow up and deal with it like the rest of the world. I have read most of your blogs and find you to be self pitying, dishonest and basically a big cry baby. You fail to mention that you have nurses that help during the week and that your mother, father and grandparents to help out as well. They also help you out financially when necessary. You don't keep you house, do dishes, take out the trash or much of anything and you use your fibromyalgia as an excuse anytime something comes up you don't want to deal. Your life isn't as hard as you like everyone to think it is. So why don't you just grow up and get a grip.

Melissa said...

siren- ::smile:: we will survive... we always do... I'm worried about my mom though...

starbender- its the "Mommy-mobile!!!" I love it! I'm lucky I have family that helps out as they can... I don't know what I would do without them :)

sol- ::sniff:: you are too sweet for words, I hope you soon find someone with a soul as beautiful as your own to walk by your side... And my mom was already "super" so adding "bionic" would be no big jump! :)

anonymous- I could erase your negative post... but I chose to leave it alone... just as I choose time with my children and husband over the dishes... and just as I choose to forgive you for judging me without ever having walked a mile in my shoes. I chose to express MY views on MY life openly and honestly under MY name on this blog, so that I do not bottle up unhealthy emotions and take them out on someone who does not deserve my wrath. If that disturbs you... you can choose not to read it.

Anonymous said...

Your response was just what I expected. You see, I have known you for years and during that time I have watched you become a self centered, self obsorbed, ungrateful, unthankful little girl. I do not ask for your forgiveness, as I have not judged you. And by the way, I have walked a more than a mile in your shoes. I have merely pointed out the truth that you chose to ignor. You express YOUR views openly and honestly? When are you going to post the honest part? You percieve YOUR life to be something that it isn't! Basically, you are wanting to be the center of attention, as always, and you will do or say whatever it takes to get stroked. Have you given one thought to those around you that have hurt by your dishonest and vain babblings? Of course not because that would mean you wouldn't be getting stroked like you so desperately desire and need. However, the one thing you are correct about is, I don't have to read this anymore and I like the rest of the people close to you I chose not to read about your pity party any more. In closing, instead of forgiving me, try asking for forgiveness for all of those so close to your little pity party has hurt. Try starting with your mother, father, and grandparents.

Melissa said...

anonymous- for someone who has 'known me for years' you seem to have little insight into our family dynamic. I tell my family on a regular basis how much I appreciate their continuing support. My Mom, Dad and Grandparents have always been there for me, and I KNOW what a special and rare thing that is. They are my spiritual guideposts and I try my best to never take them for granted. I am sorry that your opinion of me is so low, but that is not my cross to bear. I hope that lashing out at me in this manner has brought you some peace and happiness, and I hope that if you have children, they are healthy so that you never really have to know what it is like to watch your child knock at death's door time after time.

Anonymous said...

I am obvisouly more familiar with your family dynamics than your are and I must be the only one, out of the two of us, that is totally aware of how your family is feeling at this time. This is not lashing out at you. How typical of you to make yourself the victim once again. This is a wakeup call that you seem to refuse to want to answer. Maybe you should come out of yourself long enough to find out how those close to you are really feeling. My opinion of you is only as low as you have proven yourself to be. This is not my cross to bear, but rather the cross you would want me to bear for you. Which I will not. Nothing about this brings me peace and happiness, especially when you have so totally devastated those closest to you with your pitiful writings. You were raised not to be a dishonest, self pitying, self centered, ungrateful, thankless victim of life. Trials, sicknesses, cancers, births and deaths, disabilities, watching children knock on death's door time and time again, and hard times have been and still are in my family as well, however, we chose not to wallow in selfpity, we chose to be thankful, appreciative, grateful and live life to the fullest. But most importantly, we are ever thankful and respectful of those closest to us. Give it a try.

Anonymous said...

Melissa,

Let your mom field this one.

Anonymous....How DARE you to presume you know what Melissa's family is feeling! The things we do for Melissa and her family are done out of LOVE...which is something you obviously lack since you claim to be close to us, but apparently just don't "get it"! We may occasionally gripe or complain about Melissa and how much she depends on us, but that is OUR perogative as her loving parents and grandparents. You want to talk about being honest? Then tell me who you are so we can have a face to face discussion about this. I feel it is very COWARDLY and DISHONEST of YOU to attack Melissa anonymously. You consider yourself to be a friend of this family? Then I suggest you think again....myself, her father, nor her grandparents would welcome you to do this on our behalf, because we LOVE her and do not want to see her hurt by your hateful words. You say you have walked in her shoes? Let me tell you this...NO ONE knows what Melissa goes through on a daily basis.....not me, her Father, her grandparents....NO ONE. Yes Sammi has an absolutely WONDERFUL nurse who goes to school with her every day and takes care of her. But she leaves after Sammi gets home and Melissa has her for the rest of the time. When YOU have to lift her 40 plus lbs. countless times a day to put her on the potty, get her dressed, undressed, bathed, loaded into her wheelchair, transferred to her car seat, load the wheelchair, which is 60 plus lbs, unload the wheelchair and transfer her back into it, when YOU have to fight all the battles Melissa has had to fight for 6 long years to make sure she has all the equipment and medecines and Drs. that she needs to survive and have a better quality of life, When YOU have to perform rescue breaths on your children to keep them alive when you are shaking so hard inside scared to death you are going to lose that child....maybe, just maybe you would have a small taste of Melissa's life and would see. Until then...I suggest you BACK OFF...because you have NO IDEA what you are talking about and NO RIGHT to presume you know what her family is feeling.. YOU ARE NO FRIEND OF MINE, OR THE REST OF THIS FAMILY!

Brenda Myers, Melissa's MOM

Anonymous said...

Signing in as anonymous has allowed for things that should have been said long ago. You feel that signing on this way is cowardly or dishonest - and maybe so - but would she have have listened any other way. I am not speaking for you or the grandparents, I am speaking of what I have seen, heard and witnessed day after day, month after month, year after year. I have seen the bitter treatment, heard the harsh words and witnessed the manipulation that is used. I have seen your tears and witnessed your pain and anger. If this does nothing else but make Melissa realize that this is not all about her, that this shouldn't be a pity-party for just her, that she is not the only one suffering, feeling depressed, cheated, put out, and used, then it is worth not being a friend of the family. Up to this point this blog has been a POOR ME site. She was even put out at your having double knee replacement. After all she was not going to have a babysitter and she would probably have to work a couple of 12 hour days. Where was the sympathy for you? Where was the kindness for you? You are a fabulous mother and grandmother, so your responding to this doesn't surprise me. You have once again come to Melissa's rescue. You are a kind, caring, giving person who at least deserves a little sympathy and respect for your own daughter. I have pointed out the truth and I know that it is harsh, but maybe she will realize her life isn't as tough as she would like all of these readers to think it is. She was compared to Christopher Reeve, a saint, etc., by these people. What about all of those people like you and the grandparents that have been there through it all. Does she ever mention all that you do? Not just as an afterthought, but all that you really do? This is my last post, and I will "BACK OFF", as you put it. But remember the next time, (and there will be a next time) your daughter talks bad to you, makes you cry, makes you feel used, manipulated and breaks heart, at least someone cared enough for you and the grandparents to tell her the truth.

Anonymous said...

Ok, this is my two cents...it seems to me, that if you really knew Melissa and her family so well, that you wouldn't have to do what you are doing on this website, because you would be able to do it face to face. You would know that yes, they may argue and fight occassionally, but I would like for you to show me the family that doesn't. It seems to me that you are trying to point out your view of Melissa's shortcomings so that you don't have to look at your own. I don't know if I know you or not...personlly I don't give a damn if I know you. I agree with Brenda when she calls you a coward. This family is not about going behind each other's back and talking trash. Everything that I have ever heard Melissa say about any of her family, she has gone to them and talked to them to express how she feels. So, apparently you don't seem to know everyone as much as you feel you do. I personlly think that you are nobody and amount to nothing. (And before you make some smart remark about me making this post when I think that. I always come to Melissa's aid whether it is to take up for her against a nobody in life, or if she is having emotional problems...etc.) In short, I think you just need to fall off the face of this planet, or grow up. If you don't like what I have to say, you can respond to my personal email address cherokee1977@aol.com. But you really don't need to waste anymore of my WIFE'S time!!!

Sol said...

Melissa ~ thank you ::smiles @ her::