They Call Me Crazy...

How long would YOU wait?

2011-06-22T23:56:00.001-04:00

WE NEED YOUR HELP!

2011-06-21T11:24:00.004-04:00

Please help us by voting EVERY DAY!!

Overall...

2011-06-03T09:56:00.004-04:00

I'm SO EXCITED!

On the 11th of this month I am going for a visit with my primary care doctor to be referred to a plastic surgeon so I can FINALLY have my breast reduction!!! I'm not looking forward to the operation itself or the recovery time following the operation BUT, I am VERY eager to be done with the back spasms and assorted pains that lugging around GG cups causes.

In OTHER news:

Dad is still doing chemo to fight cancer. All things considered, he is holding up fairly well for a guy who was supposed to be (at least according to the doctors) long gone by now. Unfortunately, the cancer HAS jumped to a new organ system, which brings us to a grand total of three. It started as colorectal, metastasized to his liver & has now migrated to a lung. On the bright side: The tumors all seem to be responding to the chemo and shrinking a bit so, even though it has spread to a new organ, it is still feasible to treat the cancer as a chronic illness instead of a fatal one! We continue to hope for the best and live each day thankful for every moment God chooses to give us as a family.

The kids are hitting Summer FULL SWING! Auron graduated kindergarten, Xander is almost fully potty trained and Drayden has hit his "terrible two's" early and is driving what little sanity was left in this house screaming as it bails out the back window! Samantha has been fighting off a nasty infection around her feeding tube for the past month but I think we have almost won that battle. Seizures are a whole different story. I can't seem to convince Samantha's neurologist that aggressively treating her seizures, even with an increased risk of side effects, would be well worth it if she gains even a marginal improvement in her quality of life. In his defense, Samantha has only been his patient for about 6 months and he is still getting to know us. I have to give him props for being open to discussion and happily letting me be an active participant in Sam's care and for being reasonable when it comes to his willingness to ask for consults with doctors out of state who specialize in treating neurological issues in people with Angelman Syndrome. Any doctor who DOESN'T think he is God gets MAJOR bonus points in my book!

I'm still happily growing the relationship with my long lost sister and only wish she lived closer so we could have more bonding time face to face. Funds are tight, as they always tend to be when you have a family of six to feed and clothe, but I feel very blessed and fortunate because I know there are SO many without any income at all right now.

Overall, life is good!

Overall, we are wonderfully BLESSED and THANKFUL for the gifts GOD provides!

Walking For Samantha...

2011-04-19T10:03:00.001-04:00

WOW, I have no words...

2010-11-05T00:06:00.001-04:00

Only in America would this be possible: Bacon-Flavored Soda Sizzles Onto Shelves

Where did all the dust-bunnies come from?

2010-10-26T01:09:00.004-04:00

As any repeat reader of my blog can attest, I generally blog when I can't sleep because I have too many things buzzing through my brain. Such is the case tonight, so I thought I would fight off the ginormous dust-bunnies that are trying to colonize my poor neglected blog and fill you guys in on life changes around here. (I'm also prepping for my Christmas letter, so this is sort of a first draft.)

Major update highlights for this year: I am no longer an only child! Months ago, my long lost paternal half sister and I finally found each other! She is a fabulous person and we hope to meet in person as soon as we can manage it. I am just going to call her "T" or Sis here to protect her privacy when I talk about her. T is six years older than I am and is married with two beautiful step-daughters and one handsome son. She has had a less than ideal life but was blessed with a loving adoptive Dad who still stays actively involved in her life. I'm her only sister (which is super cool from my perspective!)

Dad is still fighting the good fight and recently had another operation to remove more cancerous tissue. He is ornery and doesn't go to the doctor for half of the things he probably should but he assures me he is not going to give up any time soon. He has lost weight (much more than would be healthy) for over a month and is struggling to keep enough nourishment in his system to even stay hydrated and maintain his weight. My grandfather swears he is starting to look like a toothpick.

Dad's hospital stay after his last operation was much longer than they originally anticipated which left Samantha in the care of a family friend who didn't have the proper paperwork to seek medical treatment for her in case there were an emergency. The Army considered the situation a child care emergency and granted emergency leave to my husband so he could drive to Texas to pick up Samantha and her mass amounts of equipment and bring her back home to live with us again.

MY CHILDREN ARE ALL UNDER THE SAME ROOF FOR THE FIRST TIME - EVER!!!!

We are still working out all the details that go into meeting Sam's needs but the good news is that my body has held up surprisingly well to all the lifting and moving involved in her day to day care! Things are VERY busy around here because we don't have nursing help set up for Samantha yet and adding all of her daily requirements to the already hectic schedule of three small boys has been... interesting to say the least! We have not had the jealousy from the boys that I expected. They have all been exceptionally sweet with their sister and mostly argue over who gets to help take care of her. I have been blessed with some wonderful kiddos and I can't wait to see what wonderful and compassionate men they will grow into as a result of growing up with our beautiful girl!

Auron started school this year and is doing great! He loves his teacher and has made lots of friends. Focus is a bit of a problem for him, but he IS mine after all! He is turning into such a sweet little gentleman and I am so pleased with the tender personality that he is growing into. Xander doesn't look like a baby any more. He has grown so much this year and looks so much more like a little boy now. He is a very loving child and constantly follows me through the house kissing my hands and hugging me. He has one of the most beautiful smiles I've ever seen and a giggle to match! Drayden is almost a year old and just started walking. He is bursting with WAY more personality than the average twelve month old. He dances every time he hears a beat, wags his pointer finger at you when he is talking to you, giggles and smiles all the time, and ADORES Auron.

I am feeling very BLESSED and thankful for so many reasons. Please keep us all in your thoughts and prayers as we always need them, and special prayers for my Mom and Dad would be much appreciated!

Never Gonna Stand For This by Teachenor Clark

2010-09-06T11:15:00.000-04:00

Parenting and Happiness Pair Well, Despite What You Read

2010-07-13T21:17:00.000-04:00

Great article: Parenting and Happiness Pair Well, Despite What You Read

USS Indianapolis CA-35

2010-07-08T14:10:00.000-04:00

This story has touched me over the last few days. I never learned about this in history class, but it is an important thing to know and remember. In memory of all those lost and in honor of those who survived the sinking of the USS Indianapolis CA-35 please read their story.

Ray Stevens...

2010-05-19T23:21:00.001-04:00

Today's song...

2010-05-03T13:56:00.000-04:00

Venting...

2010-04-16T23:31:00.003-04:00

Intelligent Design and Creationism - The idea that everything that exists is here on purpose. Thought out, created and placed by someone or something bigger than the human race.

The Big Bang Theory - The idea that everything that exists is the end result of some massive cosmic fart. It was all a happy accident that the Earth formed and the water and land separated and things started developing out of some primordial mud puddle that eventually led to the human race and every other living thing on the planet.

Why, when you believe in the second idea, are you considered a scientist or scholar, but believing in the first makes you too stupid to know better?

To me the massive cosmic fart theory is like being convinced that the Mona Lisa painted itself and Requiem sprang forth from an unattended instrument without any input from a composer.

If you believe in the big cosmic fart, that's fine. But please have enough common decency and respect when you are in a room with people you KNOW have different beliefs than you do, not to look for any opportunity to ridicule them and treat them as intellectually inferior.

Remember, people "knew" the Earth was flat and those who knew differently were thought to be idiots in their day. We now know those idiots as visionaries and those who "knew" the Earth was flat were just too caught up in their own superiority complex to bother with the bigger picture.

Morris 'Dick' Jeppson, Enola Gay Atomic Bomb Specialist, Dies With No Regrets - AOL News

2010-04-08T23:39:00.000-04:00

Morris 'Dick' Jeppson, Enola Gay Atomic Bomb Specialist, Dies With No Regrets - AOL News

Update and request for help...

2010-01-10T22:32:00.010-05:00

It was recently brought to my attention that I have fallen WAY behind on my blogging since my hubby returned from Iraq. In my defense, we DID have 15 very long months to make up for. Still, I have neglected my poor blog and must fill the world in on life in general around here.

(If I remember correctly we were supposed to have a colony on the moon by now, right?)

We moved to Fort Gordon at the end of October and at the beginning of November our R&R baby Drayden Tobias was born. He weighed in at a whopping 7 pounds 11 ounces and has been a very healthy boy!

My Beautiful Daughter Samantha is still in Texas with Grandma and Grandpa. Grandpa is still fighting Cancer and Samantha helps him remember exactly WHY he has been fighting so hard for the past three years. They inspire each other and Samantha has been doing quite well with Grandpa to cheer her on but unfortunately, she is getting bigger every day.

Samantha is very social and loves to be around people. She loves going to church on Sundays and Wednesday nights and she loves going to the drive in movies with Grandma. When she was still small enough for me to handle on my own she loved going shopping with me. She goes to therapy once a week and makes the 20 hour round trip to see her doctors in Houston once every three to six months. It is SO hard to get her anywhere because she does not have a wheelchair accessible vehicle. Anyone who has ever researched the price of wheelchair vans will tell you that they are insanely expensive. They average between $20,000 and $60,000.

My parents were recently given the opportunity to buy a used wheelchair van for the astonishingly low price of $4,500. None of us can afford it but we also know the chances of ever running across a deal this good again are slim to none. It is an older model van but it has lower mileage than the vehicle they have now and the wheelchair lift is in perfect working order. So if anyone reading this would like to help Samantha with a BIG quality of life issue AND help her stay with her family for MUCH longer (instead of having to go into a "home" because we can't get her out of the house), please click the donate button on the sidebar to your right and give whatever you can.

I promise to keep everyone updated on our fundraising progress and (I hope) post photos of Samantha with the van once we find a way to buy it. For now I will post a video of Samantha at therapy so you can all see how big she is getting. Thank you in advance for any help you can give my beautiful girl!

Military time...

2010-01-05T12:19:00.000-05:00

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

'Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?'

'Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature.'

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, 'It looks like you have seen a lot of action.'

'Yes, ma'am, a lot of action.'

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, 'You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself.'

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, 'You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when was the last time you had sex?'

'Not since 1955, ma'am.'

'Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955!'

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to 'relax' him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, 'Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955.'

The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, 'I hope not; it's only 2130 now.'

(Gotta love military time)

Something to make you giggle...

2010-01-03T17:30:00.001-05:00

Remember The Troops This Christmas...

2009-12-08T13:25:00.002-05:00

Click on the title to see a great video. My husband is home with us this Christmas, but thousands of soldiers are away from their families and this time of the year is the hardest part of a deployment.

To Lighten the Mood...

2009-07-10T01:41:00.001-04:00

The other day I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends.

One is engaged, one is a mistress, and of course I have
been married for 20+ years.

We were chatting about our relationships and decided to
amaze our men by wearing a black leather bra & bodice,
stiletto heels and a mask over just our eyes. We agreed to
meet in a few days to exchange notes.
Here's how it all went:

My engaged friend:
The other night my boyfriend came over and found me wearing
a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
I love you.' Then we made love all night long.

The mistress:
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and
I was wearing the leather bodice, heels and mask
over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he
didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.

Then I had to share my story:
When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice,
black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. As soon
as he came in the door and saw me he said…

"What's for dinner, Batman?"

Once again...

2009-07-08T04:45:00.002-04:00

Trying to shut up those who believe an unborn child is STILL a child... Because why should freedom of expression run BOTH ways, right? Just click on the title to read the whole story...

ACLU Nutjobs are at it again! Leave our Veterans ALONE!

2009-07-06T14:04:00.000-04:00

Twitter kicks *ss! (grin) and youtube rocks too...

2009-06-24T21:31:00.001-04:00

Happy Father's Day...

2009-06-21T01:36:00.002-04:00

I love you Daddy! Thank you for always being there and loving me... even the times it drove both of us nuts!

Always Remember...

2009-06-05T22:17:00.001-04:00

Just The Thing For Mother's Day! (SMIRK)

2009-05-10T21:38:00.002-04:00

Doug Powers made me giggle today...

Missing My Miracle, My Angel, My Sam...

2009-05-03T00:49:00.002-04:00

Why Women Can't Sleep...

2009-04-25T00:55:00.003-04:00

WHY WOMEN CAN'T SLEEP

Have you ever wondered how a woman's brain works? Well....it's finally explained here in one, easy-to-understand illustration:

Every one of those little blue balls is a thought about something that needs to be done, a decision or a problem that needs to be solved. A man has only 2 balls and they take up all his thoughts.

Attention All Photographers!!!!

2009-04-21T21:35:00.004-04:00

Attention All Photographers

(especially if you live in or close to a military town) check this out!!!

I can not express in words the impact that your time could have on a military family.

On a YouTube trip it would seem...

2009-04-16T18:56:00.002-04:00

Never too late to dream...

2009-04-16T16:57:00.003-04:00

Beautiful! Click the heading above to see the most inspirational thing I've seen in awhile. I couldn't find a video that would let me embed it here, so you just have to click the link. Trust me, its worth it!

Click here for a giggle...

2009-04-15T04:25:00.000-04:00

Powers makes me giggle!

The Mom Song...

2009-04-13T21:30:00.000-04:00

The Ghost Breakers...

2009-04-07T22:34:00.002-04:00

Made me giggle so hard I almost wet myself...

Finding the silver lining...

2009-04-07T20:01:00.005-04:00

So today has been an interesting day...

I have several different types of fibromyalgia flares. Some are straight pain flares... like the aches you would get from the flu and arthritis on massive steroids. The pain flares suck but, believe it or not they are the easier ones to deal with. Take some pain meds and limit my movement for a day or two and I can bounce back with minimal amounts of cursing under my breath when the children bounce off of me.

Then there are what I call SENSORY flares. These suck worse than just about anything on the planet. Anyone who has ever had a bad migraine headache (or even a major hangover) can get a very basic idea of what a sensory flare is like. With a migraine (or killer hangover) your senses of hearing and sight get mega sensitive. Every small sound or bit of light is amplified 10 times its original strength. A slamming door or an overhead light cause intense physical pain... Now take that concept, that ultra-sensitivity, and apply it to ALL your senses at the same time.

I feel like I have some small comprehension of what it must be like to be stuck in an Autistic mind and body because these particular flares often lead me to curl up in a dark quiet room with my eyes squeezed shut and my fingers in my ears hoping to stop the painful sensation overload. My toddler running his fingers across the back of my arm feels like someone has pulled the edge of a hot pan from the oven across my flesh... scalding, searing pain that makes my muscles twitch and jump to escape the touch. Changing a dirty diaper or taking out the trash smells like what I would imagine wading through waist deep raw sewage would.

The only major up side to this type of flare (and talk about searching for a silver lining!) would be the rare opportunity to lock myself alone in a pitch dark and quiet room while letting my highly sensitive taste buds go nuts over bits of dark chocolate melting on my tongue... If only all the overly sensitive stuff could be that good!

Soap Box of the Day...

2009-03-18T02:50:00.002-04:00

Could someone please tell me why this is OK on Mr. Rogers Neighborhood, but on Facebook it is pornographic material? I think someone has their priorities a little screwed up (and it's not Mr. Rogers).

happy sniffles...

2009-03-16T14:44:00.003-04:00

OK. So I know that when I'm all hormonal and growing another human being I can cry over toilet paper commercials, but I'm fairly sure this awesome story would have made me bawl even if I wasn't on a baby hormone high.

Quick update...

2009-03-14T23:38:00.004-04:00

saying goodbye at the end of R&R

My cousin Julie is officially a "MRS." now! Congrats to her and her Handsome new hubby Jeff! Yay for wedding bells!

My cousin Rachael, who's son Carrick I requested prayer for awhile back, has her beautiful and healthy boy home with her where he belongs now! Thanks so much for your prayers!

My husband was home for R&R in February and tomorrow marks the start of month 12 for this deployment. We are on the downhill slide now! YAY!

OH... and in November we will be adding an R&R souvenir to the family!

Yup... He is strutting around with his chest all puffed out... SO PROUD he "knocked me up" over R&R. Yay, for babies! (Last one for us though, four is a good round number.)

Feeling a little emotional tonight...

2009-03-14T23:14:00.002-04:00

Rant of the day OR Obama to remove MD's rights...

2009-03-12T01:42:00.005-04:00

Abort73 Graphics / Abort73 Shirts

THIS is officially the first major thing to thoroughly piss me off about the current administration.

Removing the RIGHT of health care workers to refuse to participate in the murder of an unborn child for religious or ethical reasons... That would be like forcing an Orthodox Jew to eat pork or forcing a radical Muslim into a bikini (only worse because to those of us who believe a child is a child even before birth... IT WOULD FORCE SOMEONE TO MURDER ANOTHER HUMAN BEING)!

It seems to be socially unacceptable to force a person to actively participate in activities they do not believe in... unless of course, that person believes that an unborn child is an individual (different DNA than it's mother) and (worse than that) might even be a Christian!

OH SHAME!

Why should it no longer be OK to tell someone that you will not personally help them kill their baby?! There will ALWAYS be "Dr.s" who will be happy to assist in that particular procedure - let's face it:

Abortion is big business in America.

Yet another reason to love boobs...

2009-02-28T22:55:00.003-05:00

I have always liked Salma Hayek as an actress and, as an added bonus, I think she is incredibly beautiful. (If I was a guy or not straight and blissfully married, I would SO put her on my people to do list...)

After reading an article on ParentDish about a beautiful and wonderful gift she gave to a mother and her starving child during a UNICEF visit to Sierra Leone in September 2008, Salma Hayek has officially moved to the very top of my favorite celebrities list.

When Wedding Cakes Go WRONG...

2009-02-01T02:11:00.004-05:00

And, in honor of my cousin Julie's upcoming wedding I would like to share some wedding cakes posted on Cake Wrecks. To remind her Mom that there ARE worse things out there than a western themed wedding, and to make everyone else gasp/smile and/or giggle while frantically calling their baker to make sure they have a "backup cake" ready in case the original is delivered in less than expected condition.

NICU Flashbacks & Requested Prayers...

2009-02-01T00:10:00.004-05:00

Me holding Samantha in NICU 4 1/2 weeks after her birth.

Tonight my heart is broken for my cousin Rachael and her husband Corey. Rachael gave birth to the couple's first child on Wednesday night... two months early. Little Carrick is in NICU, breathing on his own, and from my cousin's brief email description, seems to be a fighter.

Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers, they are going to need it.

I can't help but have flash backs to when Samantha was born two months early. I remember so vividly the feeling that, somehow, I had failed my child. I felt betrayed by my own body and angry that there was nothing I could do to make things better. I was terrified of loosing my daughter before I ever really had the chance to know her and I wanted to find a way to protect her from all of the pain that comes along with an extended NICU stay.

Mostly I just felt helpless and confused.

How and why could this happen to us? What could I have done differently to make her enter the world healthy and full term? How did my WHOLE WORLD suddenly shift to dramatically revolve around this tiny piece of me? How is it possible to love someone so small SO much more than I have ever loved anyone, including myself?

My heart is broken for my cousin, not because I think her son will not survive, quite the opposite. My heart is broken because I have been in her shoes, and I know how it feels to be a mother who must watch her child fight for every step, knowing there is nothing you can do except watch, wait, and pray that God will pull you through.

When You Change Careers, Do It RIGHT! LOL!

2009-01-29T01:43:00.004-05:00

A gynecologist had become very fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork and was feeling burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical college, signed up for classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could.

When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade." The instructor said:

"During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. "You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark." This equaled an A. After a pause, the instructor added:

"I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the

muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire career."

When You Change Careers, Do It RIGHT! LOL!

Vent of the day...

2009-01-26T23:20:00.006-05:00

So, I am EXHAUSTED! I want to blog, but I'm just not sure I have the energy tonight... So, you guys get a very brief update:

Samantha has been hospitalized well over a thousand miles from me (which, in case you are wondering, sucks big green monkey nuts). She ran fever all weekend long and her O2 sats were... well, less than great at the clinic this morning. She has BOTH the Flu (and Yes, she did get a Flu shot this year) AND Scarlet Fever. Leave it to Sam to get horribly ill right after Mommy leaves town... (grumble, grumble)

Meanwhile...

Dad's incision from his "let's chop out 75% of your liver to get all the cancer" procedure has opened up enough that you can see the internal stitches. He went to the ER and they think he has another infection and are dosing him up on broad spectrum antibiotics while they wait for the culture to grow something shnazzy (and by shnazzy I mean "ewwwwww! gross!)...

And HALFWAY across the freaking country...

I am worried about Sam & my Dad and feeling utterly helpless and useless knowing there is NOTHING I can do to help. My Mom is going to run herself into the ground trying to take care of Sam and worry about my Dad too.

And without someone there to bug the royal CRAP out of my Dad (Yes, I KNOW you are reading this, and you KNOW how hard headed you are!), he likes to ignore/blow off/live in total denial of anything that makes him feel slightly off. Dad is the kind of guy who wouldn't mention heart attack level chest pain to anyone until you noticed him holding his chest and turning blue... And EVEN THEN he would do his best to convince you that "it doesn't really hurt that bad..."

STUBBORN MALE. Exhibit #1 - My Daddy.
(I just point this out because I'm so worried he will ignore something significant that will come back and bite him in the rear later...)

Please pray for Samantha and my Dad... and DEFINITELY pray for Mom. She gets to deal with Dad's stubborn nature AND all of the *SARCASM* "brilliant" medical professionals in that area*SARCASM*! Yes, extra prayers for Mom.

And for your daily dose of giggle, you should go check out Cake Wrecks explanation of why you should never order a cake over the phone . It made me fall off my yoga ball...

Link of the day (things EVERY woman should know)...

2009-01-22T14:17:00.000-05:00

Start spreading the word: Abort73 Graphics / Abort73 Shirts

Angels & Pilots & Luggage, Oh, My!

2009-01-14T10:09:00.008-05:00

Hello again Blogland! I am home now and finally feel recovered enough from my trip home to update. My four month visit with my family in Texas went (mostly) well. There were a few minor hiccups from time to time, but nothing major. I am thankful that my grandparents were able to put up with me, the boys and all our stuff in their space for four months. I was able to spend quality time with my family, be there to help out when Samantha had her operation, and be there to help Mom (and irritate the crap out of Dad) when he had his operation. I will tell everyone more about family interaction and operations in a later post (when the boys are NOT climbing the rafters).

I flew back to North Carolina on January 10th. I have never been a big fan of Delta Airlines, but since Army Support Services made (and paid for) my airfare to Texas and back I had no intention of arguing about HOW we got there. I arrived at the airport in Odessa an hour before my flight was scheduled to take off thinking that would be more than enough time to get checked in and through security (even with my four heavy carry on items and a gate checked car seat). I was apparently wrong. The one employee trying to get people checked in at the desk was way overwhelmed. She honestly was doing her best, but the people in front of me in the line had overweight bags that they decided to unpack and repack without moving to the side. By the time I grabbed my boarding passes (and later discovered I was missing one for each flight), rushed through security with the boys and our stuff and got to our gate, the plane was getting ready to leave. We were lucky that the door had not been shut yet and we had just enough time to RUN down the ramp and get into our seats before the plane pulled away from the gate. About an hour and a half later we landed in Houston, gathered our things and prepared to change terminals. An electric cart met us at the plane and took us as far as the bus that runs between terminals. After that, I was on my own. We were dropped off at our connecting terminal and discovered our flight was leaving from the extreme opposite end from where we had been dropped off. By the time I reached the gate, lugging four carry on items, a large car seat and two small (easily distracted) boys, I was in serious pain. I had started having back spasms and couldn't even think of getting comfortable enough to rest for fear that the boys would wander off and be snatched. We had time to grab a quick bite to eat and get loaded onto our plane.

Flight number 50 from Houston to Atlanta was where my travel experience made a turn for the better. After we pulled away from the gate the safety demonstration started and my boys (thankfully) fell asleep. My back spasms were getting worse and I could feel my muscle strength going as the pain got worse. Taking a muscle relaxer when I still had one more connection to make lugging the kids was not a viable option so I made the next best choice. When the flight attendants came by with the drink cart I ordered a $7 mini-bottle of rum and some orange juice. Halfway through my drink I could feel the knots starting to ease a little, but was still fairly certain I would be unable to make my connecting flight on time. As I was lost in thought trying to figure out a way to make my body cooperate, an angel appeared at my side in the form of a flight attendant named Gwen. She had the flight roster in hand and had noticed that I had requested help between gates. I explained a little about Fibromyalgia and that I was traveling alone with my two small boys. She asked if there was anything that she or the rest of the crew could do to help with the Fibro flare I was having, and I explained that I had purchased rum for that because it was as close to a muscle relaxer as I was willing to take with no one to help me with the boys. We chatted for awhile and she asked where my hubby was (because we are apparently a very obvious military family) and I filled her in a bit more about that. She took the time to thank me for my husband's service and our family's sacrifice (which always makes me tear up a bit) and then excused herself to speak with the pilot. When she came back, she let me know that they had radioed ahead for two wheelchair escorts to be waiting for us. One for the boys and I, the other for all our stuff. The flight crew also comped my drink for the flight. As our plane landed I realized I had about 30 minutes to get to my next flight... two concourses over.

The pilot came over the speaker to thank everyone for flying with Delta and their partners and then added a special thank you to the military members and their families on the flight. I felt the tears well up again as everyone on board burst into applause to show their appreciation. Gwen asked if I thought I could make it to the end of the ramp where the wheelchairs would be waiting and I gathered my things to make as much of a dash as possible. The gentleman who had been seated behind me was kind enough to take two bags to carry up the ramp for me and as I neared the front of the plane I noticed that the pilot himself had come out of the cockpit to help us up the ramp! As I settled into the wheelchair the pilot handed my youngest son to me and, again thanked us for our family's sacrifice. I thanked him as I was swiftly wheeled away and (once again) felt my eyes water over the acknowledgement. We made our connecting flight with, quite literally, seconds to spare. The rest of our flight home was thankfully uneventful and when we landed I was too happy to be home to even care that some of my luggage did not arrive at the same time we did!

So, to the ENTIRE staff of flight 50 from Houston to Atlanta on January 10th: Thank you from the bottom of my heart! You made a very stressful day so much better, and I do not have words to adequately express my gratitude. You have made my opinion of your employer go up quite a bit and I am so pleased and thankful that you were all SO WONDERFUL to my boys and I.

God Bless Every One Of You!

And to Gwen N.:

You Rock! Thank you for your compassion and understanding. You blessed my heart that day...

The Good, The Bad & The Future...

2009-01-08T13:11:00.005-05:00

So, today is my birthday and in two days I fly back to North Carolina. I am both happy and sad. I am looking forward to being in my own space again (and WAY happy that I will have my good bed back soon). Darrell gets 18 days of R&R shortly after the boys and I get back home and I am ecstatic about being in my husband's arms again! I'm looking forward to restoring the routine that helps the boys behavior so much, but has been impossible to keep during our visit to Texas.

I am NOT looking forward to leaving my daughter behind again. I know that being here with my Mom & Dad is truly in her best interest right now. I know that the same routine the boys thrive under in North Carolina would not work as well for Samantha. I know that my parents do a brilliant job of caring for her and creating an environment where she has grown and flourished. I know that she has reached SO MANY developmental milestones since she moved in with them, and I am certain she would not have reached them as quickly as she has, had it not been for the encouragement, love and support that she receives here. (Not just from my parents and grandparents, but from our entire church family and close friends.)

Even knowing that I am doing the best thing I can for her right now, it breaks my heart for her to be away from us. Her brothers love her and enjoy playing with her more than I could have ever dreamed they would, and they miss her almost as much as I do when she isn't with us. I think that it wouldn't hurt so much to leave her here if I thought I could meet her needs as well or better than they do here... But that is the kicker. KNOWING that I am not able to meet my beautiful girl's needs (and that someone else can) kills me inside. And I am so afraid of the day when she will get too big for any of us to properly meet her needs... at least right now she is with people who love her and will protect her from the bad and ugly things in this world. I pray that God takes us all home long before I have to put my daughter's care into the hands of strangers.

Bring Him Home Santa

2008-12-25T20:20:00.002-05:00

Hoping you all have a very blessed Christmas and a safe and happy New Year!

2008-10-21T16:53:00.004-04:00

Hello Blogland!

I promise I did not fall completely off the face of the planet... just mostly.

I'm back in Texas and to tell you the truth I have been having a rough time here. It isn't really that anyone has said or done anything wrong. My family has been wonderful and I have only had a few minor "family issues". I think most of it stems from not having my own space. I'm basically sleeping in my grandfather's closet. Now before you think "how terrible!" let me explain that it IS a bedroom with a queen sized bed (horribly uncomfortable mattress, but I'll live). But I don't really have the luxury of privacy while I'm here. All the dresser drawers and closet space in the spare room are Pop's while all the rest of the closets in the house are Mam's. (Yes, I come by my clothing obsession genetically.) So any time he needs to get ready for church or anything he has to come into the room and move my stuff around to GET to his stuff.

Samantha's operation went well. We think her VNS stopped working the day before her operation but she is doing great now. We drove into Houston the same weekend that Hurricane Ike hit so finding a hotel with electricity, running water AND no "new" trees in the lobby (via the roof) was a trick! After driving around Houston for three hours we finally found one with a generator. The elevator was out so we all (Mom, Dad, Me, Samantha, Auron AND Xander) had to get up and down the stairs, but we lucked out and they had a room on the second floor. Dad also had his visit with MD Anderson while we were in Houston and they think he is now a great candidate for surgical intervention! (This increases his ten year survival odds from 5% here to closer to 70% there!) Sam has another minor operation coming up in a few weeks. She has grown so much in the past ten months that her feeding tube is too small and causing her tummy to bleed from the pressure. It is only slightly more invasive then, for example, changing out a tongue ring.

I am going to share some photos of the kids in their costumes because I'm not sure I will have the chance to blog again before the end of the month. I took these to send in a Halloween themed care package to Darrell! I hope everyone is doing well and, as always, we could use all the prayers and good thoughts you could send our way!

Until next time, God Bless!

My Beautiful Kiddos...

2008-09-09T18:58:00.002-04:00

My Beautiful Kiddos all in one place again!

Just as it should be (if life were perfect and Darrell was home).

Samantha's operation has been postponed (insurance complications) so PLEASE keep her in your prayers. We need to have her VNS replaced before the battery completely dies so that her seizures do not come blaring back at full throttle. Her brain is no longer used to that level of seizure activity and a sudden return to it could prove fatal very quickly. We hope that we can get everything worked out and rescheduled for next week (the same time Dad has to be there for his Cancer check up).

So please just pray that everything goes well and the timing works out!

If I could be a Super Hero...

2008-08-28T23:28:00.006-04:00

Her Super powers would include (but would not be limited to):

1. Laughing when she feels like crying

2. Having strength to keep moving when her world crumbles in around her

3. Always finding the silver lining (even when its more grey-ish)

4. A pain tolerance beyond that of mere mortals

5. Teleportation

6. The ability to heal others (physically, mentally & spiritually)

7. The ability to successfully mediate any conflict

Share The Music Saturday...

2008-08-23T03:37:00.000-04:00

Why I Didn't Make The Olympic Team...

2008-08-20T12:54:00.002-04:00

Crazy Mommies and babies in wells...

2008-08-17T21:34:00.006-04:00

I'm sure I looked like a complete irrational idiot to my new neighbors today.

Anyone who knows me is accustomed to the fact that I border on neurotic when it comes to the safety of my children.

For this reason Auron knows that he is NEVER to be out of my sight line while he plays outside.

Kids get snatched and step off curbs and fall into drainage systems way too fast and easy for me to be comfortable with the idea of one of my kids wandering the neighborhood unattended.

I took Auron outside to play earlier today and noticed that our new neighbors who just moved in across the courtyard were outside. Two boys older than Auron and one younger. I walked across the courtyard to introduce myself while Auron made friends with the new kids. The boys were playing nicely close to the end of one of the buildings while the moms chatted.

I looked away for what had to have been less than five seconds and when I looked back up to check on Auron...

He was gone.

I immediately jumped up (still holding Xander on my hip) and started calling for Auron and running towards the last place he had been. I called for him eight different times while frantically walking around two buildings.

He didn't answer once.

By the time I found him (perfectly safe and not missing any limbs) I was so worked up I could hardly speak.

I did not excuse myself.

I did not say "goodbye, nice to meet you" to the new neighbor.

I grabbed Auron by the arm and walked as fast as his little legs would allow us to back inside our house while telling him in a near hysterical pitch that

"you know you are NEVER EVER TO GO WHERE MOMMY CAN'T SEE YOU!!!!".

Once we got inside the house and I could put Xander down I quickly dissolved into tears.

I told Auron how badly he had scared me and that it would be so easy for someone to take him or hurt him if he wanders off like that.

We live on post and for the most part I know that it is highly unlikely that anyone would take him or purposely hurt him here. The thing I was most worried about are the huge drainage areas that are everywhere here where a toddler could very easily fall into the open sides and be gone in a matter of seconds.

I lived about 30 miles from where baby Jessica fell into a well (for any of you who remember that story) and that ordeal stuck with me all these years.

I was so afraid today that I just held him and cried because I was so thankful I found him safe.

Beautiful...

2008-08-16T21:37:00.000-04:00

81 giggles...

2008-08-15T22:58:00.002-04:00

I was browsing the web looking for stuff to cheer me up when I came across this post on Smoke & Mirrors. The more I read, the more I giggled (especially when I ran across the ones I have used in the past). Anyway, just wanted to share the madness!

Why females should avoid a girls night out after they are married....

2008-08-15T22:46:00.003-04:00

If this does not make you laugh out loud, you have lost your sense of Humor.
The other night I was invited out for a night with the 'girls.'
I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, 'I promise!'
Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily.
Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home.
Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times.
I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed... 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals = 12 cuckoos MIDNIGHT!)
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him 'MIDNIGHT'... he didn't seem pissed off in the least.
Whew, I got away with that one!

Then he said 'We need a new cuckoo clock.'
When I asked him why, he said,

"Well, last night our clock cuckooed three
times, then said 'oh sh**.' Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat,
cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped
over the coffee table and farted."

Please Pray...

2008-08-13T14:01:00.003-04:00

CANCER SUCKS

It came back...

Please keep my Daddy and the rest of the family in your prayers...

Confession of the day...

2008-08-10T00:30:00.002-04:00

I do not keep my places I lurk list on my blog for others...
I put them there so I can always find them again if my computer gets hacked and/or dies.

A few giggles in the political crap pile...

2008-08-06T22:27:00.005-04:00

Way funny take on things by a guy named Justin Paulette:

http://news.aol.com/political-machine/2008/08/06/an-irish-perspective/

And the much talked about Paris for president ad:

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/64ad536a6d

Bed time prayer (Auron's way)...

2008-08-04T22:40:00.004-04:00

This was WAY too cute not to share.

(I shot this video with my phone today, so I'm sorry for the poor quality.)

I TRIED to teach him:

"Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Lord my soul to keep. Angels watch me through the night and wake me with the morning light. Amen."

What he actually says:

"Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Lord I sorta keep. Angels watch me through the night and wake me with the morning light. Amen!"

Happy Birthday Baby Boy!...

2008-08-02T22:11:00.002-04:00

I wish I had known what a sweet and wonderful blessing Xander was going to be when I found out I was unexpectedly pregnant with him.

I was so freaked out about the details (how were we going to afford another baby) that I was in denial about the pregnancy almost up to the day I gave birth.

I remember very vividly calling one of my best girlfriends crying: "I just realized I'm going to have a baby in 3 weeks! I'm not ready to have another baby!!!"

Her quite logical answer: "Well, Melissa, you don't have much of an option at this point."

My beautiful surprise turned a whole year old today.

It blows my mind how fast the past year has gone by.

My handsome Xander is growing up, and now I'm not so sure I'm ready for that...

Happy Birthday Xander Elias!

Mommy loves you and is SO thankful that you came to be a part of our family!

What is WRONG with the world?!!!!!...

2008-08-01T22:38:00.002-04:00

This story (click on the post title to go read the news story) makes me sick to my stomach. To think about what this beautiful girl went through before she died tears my heart out.

There is a petition at this site: http://www.caica.org/index.htm

I am asking for everyone who reads this blog go sign the above petition.

It will take two minutes of your time and could save the life of a helpless child.

Please, I am sitting here in tears. I lost my god-brother because of the damage caused when he was abused in a "care facility". It has to be one of my biggest fears for my Beautiful Angel Samantha, that one day she will get too big for her family to meet her physical needs anymore and she will have to go into a "care facility".

The physical and sexual abuse that goes on, especially when a child can not communicate to tell someone...

I'm going to stop there.

I can't bear to think about it anymore tonight.

T.M.I. (I'm sure)...

2008-07-31T20:06:00.003-04:00

I was sodomized today.

Not thrilling, that's for sure.

Because of my Dad's not so recent bout with Cancer (that word will always be capitalized now) I had to have my very first colonoscopy today. Everything was fine, no abnormalities found (other than the VERY abnormal tube up my butt.) The two days of no food and constant bathroom trips getting "prepared" for the testing was an adventure in itself.

Needless to say I have had a rough few days. Thank God I have a great friend here who has taken the boys overnight last night and tonight so I could recover in peace. I'm not sure what I would do without her.

Anytime I have a bad day I pull out Darrell's cologne to spray on my pillow, or on a piece of his clothing that I cuddle with and carry around to feel closer to him. (My version of a security blanket I guess.) I don't feel well today. So I got his robe from the closet and went to grab his cologne. I had somehow misplaced it. I did eventually find it and am now calm enough to write this blog... But when I thought I had lost it feeling the way I do today... Lets just say that I am very grateful my boys were not here to see Mommy bawling because she couldn't find Daddy's cologne.

I miss my Hubby...

God Rocks!...

2008-07-30T15:26:00.003-04:00

At this point I get to talk to my husband over the Internet once a week, IF the Internet is working properly on his end. Xander will be a year old in just a few days and I have been neurotic about ALWAYS having my camera ready so I could catch his first independent steps when they happen. I probably have an hour and a half of video where Xander is just standing in place grinning at me before he decides he would rather crawl. Darrell has missed SO much with Xander I was determined to AT LEAST catch his first steps so I could send the video to my hubby to see.

Last night I was on a video call with Darrell (our once a week one), and never in a million years did I think (or even hope) Xander would take his first steps WHILE his Daddy was watching live over the web cam,

BUT HE DID!!!!!!!!!!!

Less than five minutes after he got to be a part of Xander's first steps, Darrell's Internet completely crashed. If Xander had walked five minutes earlier or five minutes later Darrell would have missed it. The timing could not have been more perfect! No WAY that was just "luck"... It was totally a God thing!

Anyway, it made me all sorts of happy and I just wanted to share!

GOD ROCKS!!!!!

Mall Photo Booth...

2008-07-29T02:27:00.001-04:00

Kenadie & Samantha...

2008-07-27T21:50:00.003-04:00

I was watching a show tonight on TLC about a little girl (Kenadie Jourdin Bromley) who has primordial dwarfism.

Instead of the thoughts most people would have of "oh, how sad." or "I don't know WHAT I would do if my child had that...", I just kept feeling jealous. I wish that Samantha had that instead of, or in addition to, Angelman Syndrome.

I know that must sound so strange. But if she was that small... I would never have to worry about not being able to take care of her. She would be able to stay in her own home with her own Mom and Dad and siblings. I know that those born with this condition have their own set of medical concerns and problems...

But I still can't help wishing this was Sam's biggest issue to overcome.

Ah, Well! Welcome to my twisted world!

Even Our Flag Fights Back...

2008-07-25T00:19:00.002-04:00

In case you can't read the small print, it says:

American Flag: $25

Gasoline: $2

Cigarette lighter: $2.50

Catching yourself on fire because you are a terrorist asshole: PRICELESS

Westboro VS. Fort Bragg...

2008-07-16T17:18:00.011-04:00

Them:

US:

I went to this rally expecting a negative experience. What I got instead, was a wonderful feeling that I am not here alone. I am surrounded by tons of people in this extended family that is the Army, and people who genuinely appreciate the sacrifices our families make.

To see the love poured out for our troops in such a visual and very vocal way was nothing short of awe inspiring! Traffic was backing up like crazy because of all the people slowing down (and outright stopping) to honk and show their support.

I have been in a GREAT mood since I left the rally this morning. Who would have thought that a day that started by me gearing up to face off with some of the most hate filled people on the planet, would turn out to be one of the best days I have had in awhile?!

While there were a few in our crowd who went to low (and amusing) blows, most of it was just very positive and supportive of our troops and their families. Although I have to admit i enjoyed the sign pointed towards Westboro that read: "Oh, just drink the Kool-aid already!"

My beautiful girl is getting SO BIG!...

2008-07-16T00:45:00.001-04:00

Fire ants suck...

2008-07-15T00:20:00.002-04:00

I have spent the last three days comforting a very sick little Auron.
He sat in a fire ant mound outside our house and got between 15 and 20 bites before I could get all his clothes off of him. He ran 103 degree fever and was miserable for three days because of it. Poor guy.
The doctor said it wasn't an allergic reaction... just a reaction.
Needless to say, he plans to avoid ant hills in the future.

People to flog...

2008-07-10T23:47:00.004-04:00

God Bless The Patriot Guard!
If you want to know more about the hate mongers of Westboro Baptist Church, visit:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Westboro_Baptist_Church

Tip for the day...

2008-07-09T17:46:00.000-04:00

Sitting naked (or almost naked) on a yoga ball is a BAD PLAN. When you try to stand up quickly to find out why one of the kids is screaming you very swiftly loose the top four layers of skin.
Just a thought...

Auron's first prayer...

2008-07-08T01:46:00.003-04:00

In case you can't understand his words, I will translate:

God is great, God is good, Let us thank you for our food. And God bless us Army Guys. (Originally God bless Daddy Army Guy, but changed when Auron decided he was an "Army Guy" too) AMEN!

Man! Is my kid GREAT or what!?

Thought of the day...

2008-07-07T02:08:00.001-04:00

Everyone should own at least one set of satin sheets. They feel great!

News... and stuff...

2008-07-04T23:14:00.000-04:00

I am attempting to do my first blog entry via the new palm centro I got a beyond rediculous deal on at radio shack. So if this looks odd, it is because I am very new to the whole palm thing. So far, I love it! Sam has to have surgery again soon and the idea of having limmited access to email while Darrell is deployed and worried about us,was a large enough concern that I took my recently upgraded phone back to the store and went with the palm instead. Please pray that I can get a loan to make it home for Sam's operation. Four days before we found out her VNS was dying I had to drain our savings (plus some) to fix the minivan. I'm waiting for bad thing number three now. Bad things always seem to hit our family three in a row. So just pray for us. Thanks.

Things to think about...

2008-06-29T20:21:00.000-04:00

Perspective

Alone...

2008-06-29T01:51:00.004-04:00

Tonight is the first time since we moved away from Texas that I have felt completely alone and homesick. I thought it would have hit me a few days ago on my anniversary, but NOOOOOO, I get the delayed reaction thing! I think it was a combination of things that brought it on. Let me elaborate:

I had been planning to go back to Texas for the holiday season. I planned on flying the boys and I home before Thanksgiving and I was going to wait until after my birthday in January to come back here. As of my anniversary, that plan is completely out the window. Why, you ask? Well, my minivan broke and I had to pay $700 to fix it. Going back to Texas for the holidays would cost a minimum of $1200 (just to get us there and back). That would have already stretched a very tight budget, but before the minivan broke I still thought I would be able to squeeze the money from someplace. Now... Not so much. That means I will spend Thanksgiving, Sam's birthday, Christmas, New Years and my birthday here alone.

I needed to get out of the house with the boys tonight. I thought it would be a great plan to go see the new Disney movie. Slight problem: there is a killer loose in our area and I do not think it would be a brilliant plan to be out on the town alone with the boys. SO, I call every friend I have made since I got into town (minus the few who are out of town), and guess how many of them answered the phone?.... None. Everyone was either working, or already attending some other function. So, suddenly the walls seem to be closing in on me AND the house feels too big for just me and the boys all at the same time.

I can't seem to sleep because the bed and my bedroom just seem so empty and lonely... and it doesn't help that Darrell's pillow doesn't smell like him anymore.

Be Still...

2008-06-25T00:50:00.000-04:00

Confession of the day...

2008-06-08T00:16:00.002-04:00

I want to bail out of the horribly crashing and dysfunctional FRG I volunteered to "help" with, but I can't bring myself to quit after I contacted families to tell them I would be here if they need me.

I'm afraid that the end result of me NOT bailing on this FRG will be a serious distaste for all future interactions with what is SUPPOSED TO BE a support system for families of deployed soldiers.

2008-06-02T23:34:00.002-04:00

Today has been a rough day.

I miss my husband. I miss my daughter, and I'm worried about her seizure activity coming back up with the Summer heat. It is so hard for me to believe that my daughter has not been under the same roof as me for about a year now.

I HATE THAT.

I know she is being well cared for, and I know she is loved beyond words.

It still hurts that she is not with me.

Today has been a rough day.

One person CAN change the world...

2008-05-31T03:01:00.001-04:00

Rest in peace Lorenzo Odone, and know that your life made a difference.

You will be missed.

I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!

2008-05-29T23:32:00.002-04:00

I got flowers from my deployed husband today!!!!!

I TOLD you guys he was the BEST HUSBAND EVER!!!!

Happy Dance...?

2008-05-29T22:56:00.003-04:00

OK.

I know someone is going to make fun of me for this, but I just can't resist sharing this with you guys.

I was walking through my local superstore the other day and came across:

TEAL DUCK TAPE!

I'm not sure why this was such an exciting thing to me.

I'm sure there is some deep psychological reason why I grabbed a roll, squealed with glee and did a happy dance that made my sons look at me like I had finally dropped completely off the edge.

I'm not even sure what I would USE teal duck tape on... But for some reason finding such a practical item as duck tape in my favorite color just MADE my day.

Since Samantha's birth, I have always looked for joy in the small moments of life, but this one even caught me by surprise.

Oh, well! Take it where you can get it, right?!

The Gratitude Campaign

2008-05-25T21:52:00.002-04:00

From my inbox...

2008-04-28T23:03:00.002-04:00

Not sure how I feel about this guy's dad posting such specific information for OPSEC reasons, but you have to admit... the guy has a valid point.

Waiting for the love of my life to return to me...

2008-04-16T20:21:00.000-04:00

ALWAYS.

My handsome little guy...

2008-03-08T17:58:00.002-05:00

He wants to be just like Daddy.

It makes me smile!

Bath rug hopscotch...

2008-03-04T23:17:00.002-05:00

Recently, our maintenance guy had to come pull up both our toilets and replace all the guts to them. I am no plumbing genius and I was unaware that pulling up the toilets that had been leaking and clogging like crazy would cause toilet water to go all over my freshly scrubbed and sanitized bathroom floors.

I have been so busy with the kids and FRG and trying to squeeze in quality time with my husband that I have not yet had the glorious opportunity to get back down on my hands and knees to re-scrub and re-sanitize everything yet.

I have a big enough problem thinking that feet are gross to begin with, so the idea of walking across a floor that has even a tiny amount of toilet water (and whatever was clogged in it at the time it was pulled up from the floor) is revolting to me.

Yet, I still have to shower and pee. This poses a dilemma and results in what I’m sure would be a hysterical show for anyone who might be unfortunate enough to witness it.

I have three strategically placed bath rugs and as long as I perch sideways on the toilet when I need to go I’m ok. Showering is a bit more complex. After I shower I take a small leap from the rug in front of the shower to the one in front of the sink and lean across the counter to get to the medicine cabinet. I take my meds and towel dry my hair then leap back to the shower rug to hang my towel on the rack. A small leap to the rug by the door, where I put on my robe and rejoin my guys for the evening.

I plan to re-bleach my floors as soon as I have the chance, but for now spending every second I can with my husband is more important to me than avoiding bath rug hopscotch.

If nothing else it will give me a productive way to take out frustration after he deploys.

Then again, I might scrub the linoleum off…

Watch for the ghost...

2008-03-04T01:00:00.001-05:00

This was too great not to share... Turn up your sound!

Myspace suckage resolved...

2008-03-03T20:59:00.003-05:00

I have the best husband on the planet!
I know I have mentioned this before, but it deserves to be said again.
I talked to him about how badly the myspace comment left for him had made me feel. He couldn't understand WHY I felt the way I did about it, but he volunteered to delete the comment. He also sent the girl in question an email letting her know that love poems were inappropriate to send to a married man and asking her not to do it again.
He didn't HAVE to act on feelings that he didn't understand, but he did because he could see how upsetting it was for me.
I have the best husband on the planet!

Daddy's helmet is hard to fill...

2008-03-01T02:10:00.003-05:00

Taken with my new Canon Rebel XTi

Yay Tax Return!

Myspace suckage...

2008-03-01T01:28:00.002-05:00

OK.
Here I sit in the middle of the night blogging again.
Why? Because I'm upset and angry and irritated.
A girl that my husband knew from his "wild and crazy" phase left a comment on his myspace page. No big deal right? Normally no. This one, YES.
She posted a romantic love poem on MY HUSBAND'S PAGE!
OK, Reality check: my husband is about to be out of the country for (unspecified humongous time span) so it isn't like I'm concerned that this would lead to a physical affair, my husband is way too smart and devoted to our family for that to be a concern. (However, an emotional one would be just as damaging and much more likely to sneak up on him, especially since we will soon be apart for XXX amount of time and he is pretty bad at picking up hints when people like him as "MORE than a friend".)
I think what pisses me off about it the most is that it feels so very disrespectful towards me and our marriage.
I want reassurance that I have no reason to worry about this.
The baby took forever to go to sleep tonight and by the time he did, Darrell had already been asleep for at least an hour.
Tip of the day: if you want your spouse to give you firm emotional support and assurances DO NOT wake them from a dead sleep in an attempt to gain it. It only makes you feel worse when the response to a sniffle filled question about your relationship is answered with a pat on the hand and a mumbled "you don't have anything to worry about babe", followed swiftly by a return to deep breathing that signals he is already sleeping again.

Random giggles...

2008-02-22T01:15:00.000-05:00

No matter the distance...

2008-02-21T19:57:00.000-05:00

ALWAYS.

ARMY: You can have your husband back... OR NOT...

2008-02-03T20:51:00.000-05:00

So... My first blog from a new state...
We have been a family again for roughly a month and a half.
Our new state is beautiful!
I LOVE HAVING MY HUSBAND IN MY ARMS AGAIN!
I will not have him for long.
Uncle Sam has called and wants to ship my husband into a war zone.
I cannot and will not say exactly where or when.
Simply that it is far too soon and he will be gone for a very long time.
I am working on ways to help our boys cope with our first deployment...
I'm still not sure how I will get through it... I just know I have to.
I have to be as strong as I can for all of us.
Even if what I really want to do is curl up into a ball and sob for three days.
I hope I can make some friends soon.
We haven't even had the chance to completely get unpacked yet and I will soon be on my own.
I thought we would have more time as a family before his first deployment. As it turns out our time is very limited.
I do have a nice neighbor who has a three year old son that Auron likes to play with. That is a plus.
We found a decent place to rent and as soon as I get out from under all the boxes I'm sure I will find it again.
Stop reading this and go hug your family now.
God Bless You All!

Merry Christmas Everyone!!!

2007-12-23T23:13:00.000-05:00

Bliss!

2007-12-22T02:05:00.000-05:00

Random Acts of Kindness...

2007-12-07T23:30:00.000-05:00

I have to share something that happened to me tonight. I have not been using the air conditioner during the day and it gets pretty hot in the house. This afternoon after the boys woke up from their naps we were pretty hungry but it was far too hot to cook... So we headed off to the mall to eat at Furrs and then let Auron run off some energy.

We sat down at the table (like always), unloaded our tray (like always), said our prayer of thanks (like always), and were about halfway through our meal when an older gentleman stopped at our table.

"Excuse me Mam... I noticed your dog tags, is your husband marching through the sand?"

"No Sir. Not yet at least..."

"Is he in town with you?"

"No Sir, He is gone for training right now."

"Oh, how long has he been gone?"

"About seven months, but he will be home soon."

"Hmmm, (as he takes the ticket off my table) Well, I'm going to take care of this for you today."

And before I had time to do anymore than stutter a timid "thank you", he was gone. I burst into tears. Auron thought something was wrong because I sat there sobbing like a baby. This random stranger reached out to do something kind for me and touched my heart beyond words.

You hear people talk about supporting our troops all the time, but those who are not in the military seldom think about the families attached to those troops. It is not hard to be a military family ONLY when your soldier is in a war zone. It is hard every day... especially when we are apart. Training and non-war deployments are hard for military families too and so often people loose sight of that fact. This complete stranger acknowledged that with a simple (and wonderfully touching) random act of kindness that I will always remember.

quiz crazy again...

2007-10-21T20:53:00.000-04:00

Your Attitude is Better than 50% of the Population

You have a positive attitude... somtimes. You prefer to see the world through clear glasses, not rose colored ones.

How's Your Attitude?

Your Stress Level is: 69%

You are prone to stress, and you're probably even pretty stressed right now.
Life's problems seem to pile up on you, and this often makes you feel depressed and burned out.
Learn to take time to relax and enjoy life, even if things are stressful. It's the only wa you'll get through the bad times.

How Stressed Are You?

You Communicate With Your Ears

You love conversations, both as a listener and a talker.
What people say is important to you, and you're often most affected by words, not actions.
You love to hear complements from others. And when you're upset, you often talk to yourself.
Music is very important to you. It's difficult to find you without your iPod.

How Do You Communicate?

Like THAT could stop Him!....

2007-10-20T01:03:00.000-04:00

I got to make a surprise last minute visit to see my husband at the base last weekend. I didn't tell him I was coming to see him, I just sort of showed up. He was way happy to see me and I was thrilled to be in the same zip code with him for 24 hours. I left Auron with Mom and Dad again so I could make the trip a bit easier and be a little more selfish with the precious little time we had together. (Thanks My-maw and Paw! You guys ROCK!) I was sitting in the parking lot waiting when he got released for the weekend and walked out onto the pad. I called his cell phone:

Me: Hey Babe! What are you doing?
Him: Oh, I'm just walking around. What are you doing?
Me: I'm just sitting in the parking lot watching you walk around.
Him: (looking up and grinning ear to ear) WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!!??

We had a good visit (and GREAT nookie), and he got to bond with Xander a little more too. I have to take a pregnancy test in another two weeks now though. Condoms are great for preventing pregnancy... when they DON'T rip. I'm not too worried about it because I'm still nursing Xander and that tends to be a natural birth control method in itself, but the whole situation has made me even MORE aware of how strange Catholics are in certain beliefs.

Here are a group of people who think any form of unnatural birth control (even when used by married couples) is a sin. They believe God created the Heavens and the Earth and everything in them in six days... but for some reason they think that if God wants you to conceive a child... a little latex is going to get in His way. Lets face it folks... When God wanted Jesus to be conceived... he didn't even let a perfectly intact hymen stop Him!

I'm not being disrespectful at all... just stating the facts as I see them... I just seem to be a bit more blunt than most might.

Oh well... If I do turn up expecting an unexpected baby again... I'm just going to look at it as God giving me a valid excuse for my insanity! :)